Well, after getting two units of blood Sunday night, my hemoglobin rose to 8.5 (still quite low, but better). Then this morning, it was back down to 6.5 because of all the blood I am still losing. So, as we speak, I am getting another three units of blood.
My doctor sat with us for quite a while last night explaining that they haven't really had too much experience with this. Gynecology would like to give me progesterone to help stop the bleeding; however, my doctor is afraid the progesterone will cause blood clots that could get caught in my heart pump. My doctor is thinking he would like for me to have a DNC; however, gynecology is opposed to the surgery because they think that scraping the uterus could cause even more bleeding and make the problem worse. My doctor said we needed to wait a few days before we could do anything anyway to take me off the blood thinners and let my blood thicken up. However, I think time is of the essence since I am losing so much blood so fast. At this rate, I will have to get more blood each morning.
The real risk in getting blood transfusions is that my body will produce antibodies with each new unit of blood. When I have the heart transplant, the more antibodies I have, the higher the risk that my body will reject the heart.
So, what I thought would be a quick trip to the hospital has resulted in at least a week's stay. :-) But the nurses and staff here are so wonderful and I have had lots of visitors. God has really blessed me. Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Monday, November 9, 2009
Home Away From Home
Yep, back in the hospital again. Lately I have felt so good and have really been thankful for all the wonderful time I have gotten to spend with family and friends. I have been so blessed to be feeling so well. Then this week, I have been feeling progressively worse until tonight I had to return to the hospital.
I was feeling extremely fatigued and would get dizzy and light-headed just from standing up (I know my mom and sisters are reading this thinking, she is dizzy and light-headed anyway...lol). Anyway, when I got to the hospital around 9 last night, they started testing. Turns out my hemoglobin (which is supposed to be around 12-16 and anything less than 8 is considered severely low) is 5.5. Yes, 5.5. The nurse asked me how I even made it in to the hospital. :-) So, as we speak I am getting a blood transfusion. And yes, it is 3:45 in the morning and I haven't been able to sleep yet. But I have only received the first of two units and I already feel a little better. So, once again, I am so thankful that God has watched over me and blessed me with an easy cure. And thanks to everyone who has ever donated blood - it really does save a life!
Not sure how long they will keep me here in the hospital, but we will try to keep the blog updated. We love hearing from all of you and visiting with you if you get the chance. :-)
I was feeling extremely fatigued and would get dizzy and light-headed just from standing up (I know my mom and sisters are reading this thinking, she is dizzy and light-headed anyway...lol). Anyway, when I got to the hospital around 9 last night, they started testing. Turns out my hemoglobin (which is supposed to be around 12-16 and anything less than 8 is considered severely low) is 5.5. Yes, 5.5. The nurse asked me how I even made it in to the hospital. :-) So, as we speak I am getting a blood transfusion. And yes, it is 3:45 in the morning and I haven't been able to sleep yet. But I have only received the first of two units and I already feel a little better. So, once again, I am so thankful that God has watched over me and blessed me with an easy cure. And thanks to everyone who has ever donated blood - it really does save a life!
Not sure how long they will keep me here in the hospital, but we will try to keep the blog updated. We love hearing from all of you and visiting with you if you get the chance. :-)
Monday, November 2, 2009
In-Laws
This weekend was a lot of fun. I have found that every second of life seems so much more valuable after you realize how quickly we will all slip from one life to the next. And each second with loved ones is a treasure.
We had Thanksgiving with Ray's step-mom's side of the family yesterday. They have been so encouraging through our difficult year. Many of his step-sisters and their families have sent us cards and letters or visited us in the hospital. I cannot thank them enough for the way they have reached out to us (even if no one tried my pumpkin cheesecake that I made from scratch... which I was so excited to be feeling well enough to make! Thankfully our dear friends Annie and Dave got to enjoy the cheesecake and a little time of relaxed conversation).
Ray's dad's side of the family also made their mark in our lives this weekend. Many of his aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. wrote us beautiful letters of encouragement, love, and prayers. It was such a precious gift for them to collectively make us a box of loving letters to help nudge us through our difficult time and remind us that even though we don't see them all the time, they are sending love and prayers our way.
Ray and I are so thankful for such wonderful family members and friends. Today this was my reading from James 5:15-16, "And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."
We have felt your prayers and God's hand in our lives lately. I have felt so well lately that I am walking an hour a day and still having energy to cook dinner and do light chores. It has been a tough time and we know we still have a long road ahead of us, but we are so thankful that we won't be going alone. And we are thankful for this precious time that we are able to share with family and friends. So please, keep the prayers coming. And please feel free to come for a visit... I would LOVE to see all of you and really enjoy every minute with loved ones.
We had Thanksgiving with Ray's step-mom's side of the family yesterday. They have been so encouraging through our difficult year. Many of his step-sisters and their families have sent us cards and letters or visited us in the hospital. I cannot thank them enough for the way they have reached out to us (even if no one tried my pumpkin cheesecake that I made from scratch... which I was so excited to be feeling well enough to make! Thankfully our dear friends Annie and Dave got to enjoy the cheesecake and a little time of relaxed conversation).
Ray's dad's side of the family also made their mark in our lives this weekend. Many of his aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. wrote us beautiful letters of encouragement, love, and prayers. It was such a precious gift for them to collectively make us a box of loving letters to help nudge us through our difficult time and remind us that even though we don't see them all the time, they are sending love and prayers our way.
Ray and I are so thankful for such wonderful family members and friends. Today this was my reading from James 5:15-16, "And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."
We have felt your prayers and God's hand in our lives lately. I have felt so well lately that I am walking an hour a day and still having energy to cook dinner and do light chores. It has been a tough time and we know we still have a long road ahead of us, but we are so thankful that we won't be going alone. And we are thankful for this precious time that we are able to share with family and friends. So please, keep the prayers coming. And please feel free to come for a visit... I would LOVE to see all of you and really enjoy every minute with loved ones.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Heart Mate II LVAD
Because I have gotten quite a few questions about my heart pump (LVAD), I thought I would post a few words on what it is, how it works, and how it affects my day to day life.
The Left Ventricle Assist Device (LVAD) is a pump that was implanted August 18 to help my heart function. The pump looks like the bottom of a kitchen sink and is made mostly of titanium. It weighs around 7 pounds. It is connected to both my aorta and left ventricle. Basically, my heart still beats, but instead of the heart pumping the blood to the body, it pumps the blood into the LVAD and the LVAD pushes it to the rest of the body. It is a continuous pump, so I have no pulse. :-) Here is a picture of the LVAD:
The pump is connected via a cord to an external controller. The controller has to be plugged into a power unit at all times. I have several batteries that I carry around during the day and a huge power unit in my bedroom that I plug into at night. We have to change the dressing on the site in my stomach where the cord comes out every other day.
A lot of people have asked if I can feel the pump in my stomach. Every once in a while if I lay a certain way, I can feel a heaviness in my chest. Also, I hear the pump continuously in my ears (it sort of sounds like a vacuum cleaner). It isn't annoying or loud, just there.
It's amazing how far advanced the medical field has come. I am so thankful to the people who have given so much of their lives for this surgery. And I thank God continuously that He is watching over us and has provided a way for me to spend more time with those I love. Every day I wake up and tell myself, "This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it." It's a new mind set when you know how precious each day is.
The pump will only be necessary until I get a heart transplant. In February they will test my heart and lung pressures again, and if they have improved, I will be bumped up on the transplant list. When I get a new heart, my LVAD and defibrillator will be removed. Praise God! I never thought I would be praying for a heart transplant, but we never know what trials we must go through.
I was talking to my sister yesterday about how there are two ways to look at every situation: with anger or sadness for the things that are tough or with thankfulness and joy for the blessings and mercy from things that could be worse. Ray and I have chosen to try our best to be thankful for the many blessings we have been given and for the way God has watched over and protected us during this difficult time. It is easy for us to get sad and discouraged, but it seems when that happens that God sends some words of encouragement to help remind us of His love for us.
The Left Ventricle Assist Device (LVAD) is a pump that was implanted August 18 to help my heart function. The pump looks like the bottom of a kitchen sink and is made mostly of titanium. It weighs around 7 pounds. It is connected to both my aorta and left ventricle. Basically, my heart still beats, but instead of the heart pumping the blood to the body, it pumps the blood into the LVAD and the LVAD pushes it to the rest of the body. It is a continuous pump, so I have no pulse. :-) Here is a picture of the LVAD:
The pump is connected via a cord to an external controller. The controller has to be plugged into a power unit at all times. I have several batteries that I carry around during the day and a huge power unit in my bedroom that I plug into at night. We have to change the dressing on the site in my stomach where the cord comes out every other day.A lot of people have asked if I can feel the pump in my stomach. Every once in a while if I lay a certain way, I can feel a heaviness in my chest. Also, I hear the pump continuously in my ears (it sort of sounds like a vacuum cleaner). It isn't annoying or loud, just there.
It's amazing how far advanced the medical field has come. I am so thankful to the people who have given so much of their lives for this surgery. And I thank God continuously that He is watching over us and has provided a way for me to spend more time with those I love. Every day I wake up and tell myself, "This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it." It's a new mind set when you know how precious each day is.
The pump will only be necessary until I get a heart transplant. In February they will test my heart and lung pressures again, and if they have improved, I will be bumped up on the transplant list. When I get a new heart, my LVAD and defibrillator will be removed. Praise God! I never thought I would be praying for a heart transplant, but we never know what trials we must go through.
I was talking to my sister yesterday about how there are two ways to look at every situation: with anger or sadness for the things that are tough or with thankfulness and joy for the blessings and mercy from things that could be worse. Ray and I have chosen to try our best to be thankful for the many blessings we have been given and for the way God has watched over and protected us during this difficult time. It is easy for us to get sad and discouraged, but it seems when that happens that God sends some words of encouragement to help remind us of His love for us.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Wonderful CoWorkers
This morning I headed downtown to clear out my office. For those of you who didn't know, I had taken a new job in March as an IT Audit Chief for the newly formed State Internal Audit Group. I had only been at the job for 3 weeks when we found out about the heart failure. In those short 3 weeks, I made some wonderful friends... and got to work with some old ones (that's not an age innuendo Joe, Jim, Greg, Ed, Chuck, and Rich).
Throughout the last seven months, my co-workers and bosses have sent flowers, cards, and some even visited me in the hospital (including my wonderful boss). I can't express how much that touched my heart...
As you can imagine, it was a great place to work. Clearing out my office (and thank you to Susan who kept my bonsai tree looking amazing) was a hard realization that it will be a long time before I am able to return to work. The doctors have told me that I am not allowed to work with the VAD (or drive for that matter:-). They have told me that they will clear me to go back to work one year after a heart transplant.
Being so young, I am really praying that God has big plans for my life. I feel like I have so much to give. I feel that because I have been so blessed with such amazing people in my life, that I want to give that blessing to others. Hopefully I will get that chance. :-) Until then, I will miss my office on the 35th floor overlooking downtown. But most of all, I will miss the people I won't get the opportunity to work with for a while. :-)
Throughout the last seven months, my co-workers and bosses have sent flowers, cards, and some even visited me in the hospital (including my wonderful boss). I can't express how much that touched my heart...
As you can imagine, it was a great place to work. Clearing out my office (and thank you to Susan who kept my bonsai tree looking amazing) was a hard realization that it will be a long time before I am able to return to work. The doctors have told me that I am not allowed to work with the VAD (or drive for that matter:-). They have told me that they will clear me to go back to work one year after a heart transplant.
Being so young, I am really praying that God has big plans for my life. I feel like I have so much to give. I feel that because I have been so blessed with such amazing people in my life, that I want to give that blessing to others. Hopefully I will get that chance. :-) Until then, I will miss my office on the 35th floor overlooking downtown. But most of all, I will miss the people I won't get the opportunity to work with for a while. :-)
Monday, October 12, 2009
Seven Years and Hopefully Many More
Today is Ray and I's seven year anniversary. As we were watching our wedding video this morning, I was thinking of how very blessed we have been. First of all, I remember on our wedding day thinking that I could never love any one more than I did Ray... but through the last seven years and especially through the last seven months, my love for him has grown more deep than I ever imagined was possible. He has shown me the true meaning of self-sacrifice. He has walked through this valley side by side with me. Often times we forget that those we love suffer just as badly as those going through the illness. So please, remember him in your thoughts and prayers and reach out to him, as he is giving all that he can and then some to try to get us through this. It is only by God's grace and mercy that we are able to make it through each day.
Secondly, we have so many people in our lives that have been such an encouragement and inspiration. My sisters, brother, in-laws, and parents and friends have been such a large part of my life and I am so thankful for the way they have influenced my life.
Some times it is hard to portray on a blog how things are really going. We have had several really wonderful days lately... but even a good day is a tough day for us lately. We are trying each day to grow into the people that God would have us be, but we are also crying out to Him constantly. He has been so faithful to bring us so far, but we know we have a long way to go.
There has been a song lately that has played over and over in my mind and comforts us at during our weakest times:
HIDE ME NOW; UNDER YOUR WING; COMFORT ME WITHIN YOUR MIGHTY HAND;
WHEN THE OCEANS RISE AND THUNDERS ROAR; I WILL SOAR WITH YOU ABOVE THE STORM; FATHER YOU ARE KING OVER THE FLOOD; I WILL BE STILL AND KNOW YOU ARE GOD.
FIND REST MY SOUL; IN CHRIST ALONE; KNOW HIS POWER IN QUIETNESS AND REST;
WHEN THE OCEANS RISE AND THUNDERS ROAR; I WILL SOAR WITH YOU ABOVE THE STORM; FATHER YOU ARE KING OVER THE FLOOD; I WILL BE STILL AND KNOW YOU ARE GOD.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Pumpkin Patch
Yesterday God gave me the opportunity to join my sister, nieces, mom, and dad at the pumpkin patch. It was so uplifting to see my four beautiful nieces having such a good time. I also got the opportunity to meet the family of a doctor who has been a huge blessing and encouragement to me through my time in the hospital... not to mention the other friends we got to see there.
Children are so sweet. At one point, one of our friend's daughter started asking me several questions about why I didn't need a wheelchair anymore and why was I carrying a bag. Explaining to her that they put a pump in my heart and that I am awaiting a new heart made me really thankful for the blessings God has provided to me. I have come a long way from the many nights of vomiting and being bed-ridden. She also made such a sweet observation, "I feel glad for you that you will get a new heart but really sad that someone has to die to give it to you." Even at such a young age, she understood way beyond her years. I have been praying for the family of the donor who will provide my new heart (although, I am still praying for a miracle and that my heart will get better on its own). Again, I really appreciate all your prayers and ask that you would please continue to pray. My heart transplant doctor said that in February, they will test my pulmonary pressures to see if they have improved. If they are where they want them to be, they will bump me up on the transplant list. (Last weekend there was a guy who was not critical, and he got a heart in less than 2 hours!) Although we are going through a dark time, it is so uplifting to have prayers being raised. Thank you.
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