Not-Transplant Birthday

01/11/10 was a day in our lives that we will never forget. After spending over a week in the hospital, I was preparing to be released at 9 am when the transplant team came into my room. They asked, "How'd you like to get a new heart today?" After having been told a transplant was my best chance at survival, but knowing it would entail literally having my heart cut out and a new one placed in me, I was overwhelmed.

It was a day fraught with every emotion imaginable. I was scared; I was angry; I was excited; I was scared; I was nervous; I was overwhelmed; I was scared; I was anxious; I was ... you get the picture.

There was some comfort that day in knowing one of my friends would be my anesthesiologist. There was also great comfort in the staff that had become my friends and a huge encouragement. But most of all, I found peace in the strength of my family and friends that gathered at the hospital with me to love me, encourage me, and to pray with me.

Most of you know that 11 hours later (after a crazy and hectic day) I was wheeled to surgery. I was at perfect peace knowing that if I didn't get up off the table, God would take care of my loved ones better than I could and that I would be in a better place. That kind of peace can only come from the assurance that whatever road God takes you down, you will willingly go.

It is difficult to think back about that day. And yet, I am so thankful for the blessings that came that day as well. For you see, when I awoke a few hours after being wheeled to surgery and learned that my own heart was healing and that I didn't need the transplant after all, I simply had to thank God for the gift. It felt to me that God had reached down through the pain that we had gone through and given us all a big hug. Words cannot describe the closeness and love that I felt to the Lord at that time. I don't know why He chose to heal me at that time, but I trust Him and thank Him for each day He has given me since.

So, a year later, I am sitting here feeling fairly healthy and counting the many blessings I have had in the past year. This holiday season was one that taught me how valuable each one of my loved ones are and how they affect everyone around them. How much light one life can bring to any relationship. How important each individual can be.

I truly hope that none of you have to lay on the operating table to receive a miracle, but I do wish that everyone could know what it is like to feel that you are so loved by God that He would do anything to let you know that He is always watching over you - even in your darkest hour.

One more thing - become an organ donor. Because although the thought of something happening to you is scary, it is inevitable and you may be able to give a very precious gift to someone else - LIFE!