Life - Two Years LVAD Free

Hello readers. Sorry for the gap in writing.  I guess I wasn't sure anyone was reading this blog; however, yesterday a Social Work Intern at the hospital reminded me of how easy it is to encourage someone else just by sharing our story.  So, for those of you that are interested, I will try to do better about sharing my thoughts and story with you.

It has been over two years since I had my LVAD explanted.  I am often asked if I ever question the decision to not have a transplant and to have my LVAD removed.  This is always an interesting question for me because although I am still tired ALL the time, have not been able to go back to work (that might be a plus on some days), and cannot have children, this in NO way compares to the blessings that I receive every day from being on this side of the ground.  Every day I am reminded of how amazing life can be and how loving relationships can mend any amount of pain and suffering.  So, of course the answer is - NO - I have gained two years of life and nothing can compare to that.

Thanksgiving was fun. Between three of my sisters, I have 16 nieces and nephews. You can only imagine how much chaos, love, and fun happens at our holidays.  I cannot WAIT for Christmas.  The only down side of Thanksgiving was the 4 pounds of fluid I put on.  Most heart failure patients are on a daily diuretic to keep off fluid, but Ray and I have been able to diet control my fluid so that I don't have to take the medicine.  But not at holidays.  Lol!!

I have been very blessed to be able to conduct my church choir again.  They are a great group and I find so much fulfillment in being able to worship with them.

With the loss of my career and feeling so tired all the time, I began to feel a little useless and lost sight of my purpose in life.  God has been reminding me that I am still here for a reason.  So, every day I choose a task/goal (cooking dinner, grocery shopping, volunteering, babysitting, etc.) and do my best to complete it.  This has helped me to rebuild my confidence and to remember that God's not done with me yet.  Some days I am a little too busy, and then I pay for it the next few days.  But I feel like each day I grow just a little and am hoping that little by little I will again find my purpose.  Blessings and love to you!