About Me

In March 2009 I was diagnosed with cardiomyopathy - Heart Failure. Within two months, it progressed to end-stage. In August 2009 I had a Left Ventricular Assist Device (LVAD) implanted to help my heart pump blood. Then in December I was placed on the heart transplant list. On January 11, 2010 a heart became available for me and I was taken to the operating room. While on the table, the surgeons found that my own heart had began to heal. I didn't get that transplant and subsequently had my LVAD removed in September 2010. Today, I have a new appreciation for life and am learning to take each day one step at a time.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Happy Black Friday!

For all of you who went shopping in the dead of the morning - I hope you got the deals you were looking for!! :-) It's 9:00am here in snowy Columbus, and Missy and her dad are off to the races, too! A little later than our typical 3:30am, but she's still excited. Me, I'm staying home to relax, rest, and get laundry done.

So the verdit from Missy's troubles in my last post (chills, fever, sweats, repeat) was, drumroll please - E. Coli in her blood. After tons of antibiotics and an Rx for Cipro, she's feeling tons better. In fact, we got to surprise her family by showing up stylishly late to dinner! :-)

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

A Rough Day (from Ray)

Like how I rhymed my post title?? ;-)

So it's been a very difficult day here at the hospital. Last night, Missy was feeling crappy when I got in from work; by 7pm she had a fever of about 101, then around 9pm it spiked to about 103. The pattern (yes, it's happened several times) has been chills bad enough to rattle the bed, then a high fever, then the fever breaks with bad sweating. Sounds fun, huh?

The docs ordered blood cultures last night, which take some time to show anything growing. Earlier today they grew a bacteria, but they're not sure what it is yet. Missy's been through a set of x-rays (to rule out pneumonia), another set of cultures, and she just got carted off to a CT scan of her abdomen.

We're both pretty frightened about what's happening, especially since the risk of infection is so high and the repercussions could be so horrible with the VAD. Please continue to pray for her body's healing and for the doctors as they treat this new issue.

On an upbeat note, happy birthday to Missy's brother, Tim! Sorry we couldn't celebrate with you.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

God's Hands

Yesterday we got a visit from a colleague and his wife (Jim and Pam). They brought a very encouraging card from my co-workers, who have been so uplifting through this entire ordeal. The card was filled with reminders that they were still thinking and praying for Ray and I. I will never be able to express how grateful I am to be blessed with such remarkable people in my life.

Jim and Pam also brought a present (porcelain hands). They explained to me that they had given these hands to a man who had cancer, and he was healed. What a beautiful sentiment that they wanted to give God's healing to me as well. The card read, "Life is a gift from God. Day after Day, he showers us with His most precious stones: Beauty, Love, Abundance... Life!" Then there were stones to place into the hands. Thank you for such a thoughtful and powerful gift.

My blood thinness level was still really low today... meaning several more days in the hospital. But I am still determined to get out before Thanksgiving. :-) Today we will be spending the day watching the famous OSU vs Michigan game. I have never really been a football fan; however, my family is. So, I decided to give it a chance. I watched my first OSU game with my Mom this season and I will always cherish that time together with her.

Also, the doctor gave me fantastic news... I CAN GO SHOPPING ON BLACK FRIDAY!!!! Admittedly, I am one of those nuts that LOVES black Friday. The shopping, the deals, the people, the getting up at 3 am, the thrill of getting exactly what you wanted for half the price. It is one of my favorite days of the year. I was really bummed about missing it and had resigned myself to spending the day Internet shopping. However, as it turns out, my doctor was in favor of me going. YEAH!! Ray isn't all that excited about it because he worries so much for me, but I think he is beginning to come around. :-)

Isn't it awesome the way God sends us tiny blessings in the midst of our storms?!?!

Friday, November 20, 2009

Hospital Humor

Still in the hospital. The bleeding is fixed but now we are waiting on my INR (blood thinness level) to come back up. Will probably be here for several more days.

We have had some funny things happen to us this visit. When I was first admitted, my nurse put her stethoscope up to my heart and then yelled, "Oh crap" and ran out of the room. I was terrified at what was wrong. I asked her what she heard and she said, "Oh, I just realized I dated something wrong and went to fix it." Not so funny at the time, but funny now. :-)

We also try to walk a few miles a day. One mile is 13 laps around the hospital. On one of our daily laps, we saw an older gentlemen using the bedside commode with the curtain completely open. LOL!

Thank you to all the visitors that have come. Yesterday two of my old colleagues came to visit (thanks Jimmy D and Joe). They brought us some goodies that we really enjoyed last night. It is amazing how small acts of kindness really speak to our hearts. It reminded me how important it is for us to always be reaching out to others in need. God has really been giving us the opportunity to encourage our neighbors here in the hospital. On both sides of me, the men are undergoing difficult tests and their families are so worried. It is such a blessing to be able to encourage them and be reminded that everything in life has a purpose. God is so good.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Surgery Went Well

Yesterday's DNC seems to have taken care of the bleeding issue. YEAH!! It was a quick surgery but I was out for about 17 hours from the anesthesia... which also made me throw up for about 4 hours. But today I am feeling really well. Praise God!

So, my doctors have started me back on blood thinners. I will have to stay in the hospital until my blood is at the right level, which could take up to a week. But another blessing... I should be home before Thanksgiving! :-)

Today I went to a support meeting here at the hospital for VAD and heart transplant patients and their families. It was really nice to get to meet other patients on the floor and to see that there is normal life after the transplant. God has given me so many blessings in the face of these trials.

Well, I'm starting to get bored here at the hospital because I'm feeling well again. So, I would love visitors or phone calls. My family and friends have been wonderful and I thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Tuesday: DNC Day (from Ray)

So after all the back and forth between cardio and GYN, Missy's set for a DNC tomorrow. She's an add-in, which means they'll get to her when they get to her. Which means no food and no drink until a while after the procedure. Which means a LONG day off waiting.

We're praying that this will take care of the bleeding issue. As I type, she's receiving her 11th unit of blood in 8 days, so something's gotta give. Sunday, one of the rounding docs dropped the hysterectomy bomb and that quickly got turned down by Missy's cardiologist today. If the DNC doesn't do the trick, they'll try an ablation, which is basically scarring the uterus.

We know that God has a purpose in all this, but we're struggling to see it right now. Please pray for Missy's procedure and that she doesn't have to go through anything else.

Friday, November 13, 2009

You Can Get In But You Can't Get Out

Day 5 in the hospital today, and I seem to be in the same condition I was when I came in. :-p As I am typing, I am receiving another 2 units of blood because my hemoglobin has dropped to 6.4 again. I am still taking the progesterone that gynecology prescribed to stop the bleeding...but have had very little luck getting it to stop. My doctor is back in town today and I am hoping to convince him to do SOMETHING to stop the bleeding. I believe he is still leaning towards a DNC. Not that I am excited about surgery, but it has to be better than a two week period. :-)

Admittedly my spirits are down a little today. Any extended time in the hospital is difficult. Ray and I often don't share how difficult this illness has been for both of us. Sometimes I think that is pride and sometimes it is just too painful to share. But it has taught us to reach out to those who are suffering and in need. It has become a daily prayer of mine to be used to reach others in need.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Blessings Abound

Even in the hospital, God provides blessings and encouragement. This morning I awoke to a care package put together by a nurse here at the hospital for me. In it was a card that read, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding." Then she wrote, "I can't imagine what you're going through, but I know I serve a big God who can do Great Things!" How very true... and God has already done great things in my life.

Well, gynecology won the war on what to do to stop my bleeding and I began a progesterone regiment last night. My bleeding has already slowed considerably. However, my blood thickness level has dropped extremely low, which means it will be a long stay in the hospital while they have to bring that back up. But praise God that I am feeling so much better. In fact, Ray and I walked our mile this morning with no problem!

As we walk the halls of the hospital, I am reminded of all the people who are struggling to survive and the families' pain of watching a loved one suffer. God has given my heart a new found sympathy (and often empathy) for their lives. I have been praying that God will use me to brighten their days any way I can.

I am so excited today is Veteran's Day. Although I am thankful to all our vets and current military personnel, I am most excited that everyone is on holiday and coming to see me!! LOL! I can't tell you how much I love company when you're stuck in the hospital. :-) So a special thank you to those who have come to visit and to those who will be coming!!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

You Can Get In... But You Can't Get Out!

Well, after getting two units of blood Sunday night, my hemoglobin rose to 8.5 (still quite low, but better). Then this morning, it was back down to 6.5 because of all the blood I am still losing. So, as we speak, I am getting another three units of blood.

My doctor sat with us for quite a while last night explaining that they haven't really had too much experience with this. Gynecology would like to give me progesterone to help stop the bleeding; however, my doctor is afraid the progesterone will cause blood clots that could get caught in my heart pump. My doctor is thinking he would like for me to have a DNC; however, gynecology is opposed to the surgery because they think that scraping the uterus could cause even more bleeding and make the problem worse. My doctor said we needed to wait a few days before we could do anything anyway to take me off the blood thinners and let my blood thicken up. However, I think time is of the essence since I am losing so much blood so fast. At this rate, I will have to get more blood each morning.

The real risk in getting blood transfusions is that my body will produce antibodies with each new unit of blood. When I have the heart transplant, the more antibodies I have, the higher the risk that my body will reject the heart.

So, what I thought would be a quick trip to the hospital has resulted in at least a week's stay. :-) But the nurses and staff here are so wonderful and I have had lots of visitors. God has really blessed me. Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Home Away From Home

Yep, back in the hospital again. Lately I have felt so good and have really been thankful for all the wonderful time I have gotten to spend with family and friends. I have been so blessed to be feeling so well. Then this week, I have been feeling progressively worse until tonight I had to return to the hospital.

I was feeling extremely fatigued and would get dizzy and light-headed just from standing up (I know my mom and sisters are reading this thinking, she is dizzy and light-headed anyway...lol). Anyway, when I got to the hospital around 9 last night, they started testing. Turns out my hemoglobin (which is supposed to be around 12-16 and anything less than 8 is considered severely low) is 5.5. Yes, 5.5. The nurse asked me how I even made it in to the hospital. :-) So, as we speak I am getting a blood transfusion. And yes, it is 3:45 in the morning and I haven't been able to sleep yet. But I have only received the first of two units and I already feel a little better. So, once again, I am so thankful that God has watched over me and blessed me with an easy cure. And thanks to everyone who has ever donated blood - it really does save a life!

Not sure how long they will keep me here in the hospital, but we will try to keep the blog updated. We love hearing from all of you and visiting with you if you get the chance. :-)

Monday, November 2, 2009

In-Laws

This weekend was a lot of fun. I have found that every second of life seems so much more valuable after you realize how quickly we will all slip from one life to the next. And each second with loved ones is a treasure.

We had Thanksgiving with Ray's step-mom's side of the family yesterday. They have been so encouraging through our difficult year. Many of his step-sisters and their families have sent us cards and letters or visited us in the hospital. I cannot thank them enough for the way they have reached out to us (even if no one tried my pumpkin cheesecake that I made from scratch... which I was so excited to be feeling well enough to make! Thankfully our dear friends Annie and Dave got to enjoy the cheesecake and a little time of relaxed conversation).

Ray's dad's side of the family also made their mark in our lives this weekend. Many of his aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. wrote us beautiful letters of encouragement, love, and prayers. It was such a precious gift for them to collectively make us a box of loving letters to help nudge us through our difficult time and remind us that even though we don't see them all the time, they are sending love and prayers our way.

Ray and I are so thankful for such wonderful family members and friends. Today this was my reading from James 5:15-16, "And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."

We have felt your prayers and God's hand in our lives lately. I have felt so well lately that I am walking an hour a day and still having energy to cook dinner and do light chores. It has been a tough time and we know we still have a long road ahead of us, but we are so thankful that we won't be going alone. And we are thankful for this precious time that we are able to share with family and friends. So please, keep the prayers coming. And please feel free to come for a visit... I would LOVE to see all of you and really enjoy every minute with loved ones.